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| Additional Theory http://kibble-me-up.co.uk/forums/viewtopic.php?f=12&t=267 |
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| Author: | dave [ Fri Jun 18, 2010 2:47 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Additional Theory |
In addition to my "repressive regimes" theory I've noticed another pattern. It's based around who has been the aggressor in armed conflict in recent history. The most recent aggressor wins. The theory plays out like this... Germany versus almost anyone - Germany win. Germany versus Serbia - Serbia win owing to Serbia's role in the mid nineties balkan conflict and Germany's peace keeping operations in same. England and USA should both be strong on account of Iraq and, accordingly, they cancel each other out for a draw. Algeria, Englands opponents tonight are, interestingly, one of only three teams (the others Being Egypt -on account of Suez - and Vietnam) who you would back France against according to this system. Otherwise with the French it's a case of early and humiliating surrender amongst much hand-wringing and bickering. South Africa's victory can be put down to their violent incursions into Namibia during the 70s and 80s. Argentina - the last war it fought was as the aggressor hence they are a powerful football nation and always beat us until 2002 when we re-found our balls and started invading people again. Spain's international underacheivement until recently can be put down to the fact that the last war they faught was against themselves... until under Aznar they joined the glorious coalition of the willing and sent troops to Iraq. Suddenly they're European champions. I can't understand why Russia aren't doing better given their recent history. Perhaps the gods of football regard conflicts taking place within the borders of the Old (and better) Soviet Union as purely internal matters and they are being punished accordingly? I've spent a lot of time on my own recently. |
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| Author: | kris [ Fri Jun 18, 2010 2:55 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Additional Theory |
Russia did very well at the last Euros. As did Croatia. This is your best theory yet, comrade. |
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| Author: | sowton [ Fri Jun 18, 2010 3:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Additional Theory |
So by this rationale, it would be expedient for, say, South Korea to invade their Northern neighbours at some point in the next week in order to ensure qualification to the second round? Or indeed vice versa. North Korea have got a tricky match against Portugal coming up. They could do with all the help they can get. Nuclear Armageddon is surely a small price to pay for world cup glory? |
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| Author: | dave [ Fri Jun 18, 2010 3:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Additional Theory |
Finally, someone else round here talking sense. |
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| Author: | dave [ Fri Jun 18, 2010 3:45 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Additional Theory |
Bugger... the Slovenes are shooting my theory to shit. A stalinesque intellectual slight of hand to rescue my rigid dogma from being rendered ridiculous by events anyone? |
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| Author: | Mark [ Fri Jun 18, 2010 3:47 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Additional Theory |
Dave - I shouldn't need to point this out to you - but it's still early doors... An excellent theory, though - one of your best (this theory that it is, that is your theory, and which belongs to you and is yours). |
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| Author: | boley [ Sat Jun 19, 2010 2:15 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Additional Theory |
I am particularly impressed with the skill you've shown here in bringing together two of your favourite subjects - sport and war. It leads me to wonder if, perhaps, there may also be a role for onanism in this theory. |
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